Chad

Chad

No, not the kid who picked his nose and ate library paste in second grade. Also, not that douchy guy that played Tristan on The Gilmore Girls. Not the equally douchy football player who tried to change his name to “Ocho Cinco.”  And no, not the errant bit of shoddily designed ballot paper from the 2000 election in Florida. The nation. In north central Africa. You know, the one with the blindingly horrific poverty, large doses of autocracy and a Darfurian refugee problem. Yeah, that Chad.

Chad, I know you don’t have a lot to work with. You’re landlocked. You’re half covered by the Sahara, and much of the rest of you is desertifying rapidly. Your namesake Lake Chad is shrinking by the hour. You are  by many accounts one of the poorest and most corrupt nations on earth, being ruled by robber baron Idriss Deby since 1990. But in the name of Allah, I have to tell you something about your flag.

Well, first, it’s pretty boring. But most importantly, um… it’s been done. In Romania. And yes, they had it first.

Romania

Remember those Olympics in the ’70s when Nadia Comenici won all those gymnastics medals? And the medal ceremony when they RAISED THIS FLAG? Chad, you didn’t really think you’d won those medals, did you?

So Chad, I have some tough advice for you right now. First, kick out that despot and find a leader that will finally address that poverty problem. Second, design a new flag. You can do better than a cheap knockoff of Romania.